Many small fixes from testing builds

[tskisner]

• Bump version of qpoint

• The local pixell recipe is out of date compared to upstream, and the
  conda-forge feedstock has everything we need. Remove the locally
  built package and use the upstream package in all cases.

• The conda MPI package now depends on ucx on linux, and this gives
  errors on installation when the package is not installed as part of
  the conda create command. Move the MPI check to before the environment
  creation command in soconda.sh.

• When using conda MPI, switch from openmpi to mpich, which has a simpler
  default configuration.

• Change test matrix to include python-3.13

• When using pipgrip to find the dependencies of pip packages and install
  them with conda, ignore the sotodlib package. We already install the
  dependencies of this package and pipgrip dies trying to recursively
  parse the large tree of dependencies.

• Build local packages with numpy-2.3 instead of 2.1.

• Fix toast and so3g recipes to include explicit dependency on setuptools

[iparask]

LGTM

[tskisner]

Ok, there is one sotodlib unit test failure on macos:

=========================== short test summary info ============================
FAILED ../tests/test_psd.py::PSDTest::test_wn_debias - AssertionError: np.float64(nan) != 1 within 0.005 delta (np.float64(nan) difference)
=========== 1 failed, 154 passed, 415 warnings in 436.56s (0:07:16) ============

But I don't think that should hold up our next tag. Merging now.